Still In Me

Tonight i feel sad, i feel that i have not reached anywhere in my life, i have not met my goals, my dreams, my ideas, or pleasures. I feel that i was just born again, that i have to start over, and it makes me a little scared because i don’t have you. I never thought i would feel this way again, but you changed it all. You have the power to do things in my life that you don’t even know. You make my days blue, or green, or black and white. It’s you who decides how I’m going to feel, and that is not good. I love you the way you are, i love the girl you are, and everything about you. Even when you make my life so tiny, and so little, i think of you, but it doesn’t make me happy.

I thought the world of you. I thought nothing could go wrong, But I was wrong. If you could get by, trying not to lie, Things wouldn't be so confused and I wouldn't feel so used, And you always really knew, I just want to be with you. You know I'm such a fool for you.

I feel that I’m very close to the end of what i always thought to be the best part of my life, the love i always dreamed of, the romance anyone would want, or desire, the feeling of your heart beating for many years to the same beat. All of what will be gone forever, being alone once again.

I want to tell you that i will never forget you, i will never forget how you kiss, how you caress, how you touch my hands, how you look into my eyes, i can still remember it all. I will never forget how long i waited for you, and still wait, but it’s the end. I will never forget the day i found you again, and the happiness that drained out of my eyes, it was a very special moment, even though you were not there to see it. I will never forget our story, all these years of pain, and suffering, everything you said to me, all the lies that you said to me, and the letters you wrote will be in my mind for life.

I want to tell you that even though you didn’t choose us, and you chose another life, it will be the bottom of my dreams and the core of my heart, it will remain there always, and it will sometimes make me cry. I will survive this because I’m strong, and because at least i have a love to remember in my life. You and I will never be together, but i, my love, will love you forever.